July 2019 OREGON part 1 7/1-7/8
6 years ago
Thursday, January 15, 2009
Okay, I Give Up!
All right, well not really, but I feel like it! I am soooooooo sick and tired of cleaning my house just to have it COMPLETELY undone it a matter of an hour or two! (I would post before and after pictures, but I'd be too embarrassed:) Does anyone else feel this way too? I know I am not alone, but seriously something has got to change! We've tried job charts, and allowance, and it just doesn't seem to do the trick. I don't know what I'm doing wrong. If I want their help to do anything it's like Nag Fest '09! Then it turns into raised voices, then yelling, then a fight or two, then I'm too exhausted, and just end up doing it myself!! Oh, and if Chuck asks them to do something, they do it, maybe not happily, but they do it at least! I don't want to turn into the Nazi Mom, but I don't want to live in total squalor either. I know I need to do something, I just don't know what. At the end of the day, I would love to retreat to scrap booking, or any number of fun "me time things", but I am either out of energy, or feel too guilty because I "should" be doing dishes, or laundry, or sweeping (again) so Ava doesn't eat it clean the next day, or sorting through the never ending homework/mail/paper pile that takes over my island, or cleaning the entry way of all the coats and boots and winter crap that seems to take over! Chuck says we should just back up a dumpster! I do sort, and get rid of stuff, and organize, but it still isn't enough! I could go on and on, but I won't because you get the point! I am committing my frustration/guilt to the blog so I will be accountable to fix this once and for all (hopefully!). I don't want to give up on having time for the things I enjoy, but I need both. A clean house, and me time. Where is Supper Nanny when you need her????
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6 comments:
I hear you! And I am sure it was extra hard with sick kids, at least it is here. They get so needy that nothing gets done. When you come up with an answer let me know, I'll implement it here!
I hit my breaking point a couple years ago. I finally just told my kids "I'm not a MAID, I'm a MOM!"
We went through each room in the house and I asked them, Who's dishes are these, who's clothes are these, who's toys are these? Ect. Then I let them know I'm not doing everything by myself anymore. It was their mess and they are responsible for it.
I spun the concept that doing chores isn't about them "helping me" clean the house, but rather if we do it quickly as a family I would be willing to "help them" clean up their mess.
If it takes all day or if I have to do it myself, Then I can't help them with things they want like driving them somewhere or playing a game with them. And you better believe they aren't going to be doing something fun while I'm doing it.
I am a total perfectionist, so I really had to start letting some things go to keep my sanity. Like how good something is cleaned.
Sometimes I actually do want to do it myself (a good thourough cleaning)but don't want my kids undoing what I've done right behind me. So I give them 2 options, something like go outside and play or help me with cleaning. If anyone comes in after 5 minutes of playing to see if they can watch TV or play on the computer I stop them in their tracks and say "Sweet, you came in to help me clean" and they usually will scoot back out the door rather quickly. Every once in a while they will say yes and start cleaning.
Something that I do, that you may find totally disgusting, is that I let things pile up a little. I've stopped cleaning the same thing 5 times in a day. I just can't stand doing the same thing over and over especially when I know I'll just have to do it again 5 mins later.
Alot of the time I only do laundry 1-2 times a week. I just get it all done at once and then hide the dirty clothes for the rest of the week :) I'll leave my dishes just rinsed off in the sink and only do dishes once in a day. Playroom toys are left out all day and everyone does a one time cleaning in the evening.
When the kids help with cleaning I reward them with my time. They have helped free up some of my time so I like to give that time back to them. Reading, games, family date nights, ect.
The messes definatley haven't stopped in my house but everyone is happy to pitch in and help get it cleaned up.
Signed, Another overworked mom, who can totally relate.
Hey, I was going to ask, how were your holidays? Are you going to post about them?
Do you have the style channel, watch Clean House. One it will make you feel so much better about your home life and 2 it might give you some inspiration to declutter. My mom would take a garbage bag to our rooms after we went to school, anything that was left on the floor we had to dig it out of the garbage before the truck came. I think you should give them each a large tub and they have to fill it with things they don't want or don't play with. Less stuff means less mess.
We have started a ticket system. They have to earn tickets by helping out to watch TV or play the Wii or computer. One ticket per 1/2 hour of TV etc. Jackson does really well and they can start earning other things with their tickets, such as 5 tickets to upgrade to Happymeal, 10 tickets to see a movie and so on. let me know if you need help organizing. I love to throw stuff away;)
Agreed! It's neverending! Someday I'll have it down, too - let me know if you figure it out before I do!
Oh I am so with you on this one! I have actually stopped deep cleaning our bathrooms and just do it with a baby wipe (or a bunch) when they get gross. I just refuse to spend like 3 hours scrubbing out bathrooms. Also I never have a large enough block of time to get it done. Goodness sakes will the paper NEVER STOP. I throw away REAMS but it still piles up.
I don't know the answer but I loved reading the comments and I also watch clean house and comparing myself to the slobs on there TOTALLY validates me as a housekeeper, as sad as that is. Good luck and if you come up with any great systems BLOG them!
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